1. |
Carry Me
05:04
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Carry Me
I hear the sound of angel’s wings
There ain’t no angels out here
That’s the son of the morning star
Come to take you as you are
‘Cross that river of fire
And the past sings to the present
In a never ending echo
But the frequency is garbled with regret
And the dead sing to the living
But the living they won’t listen
So the dead drink from the river to forget.
There’s an angel here before me
But I’m not ready
What songs could my sisters sing?
I haven’t done a single thing
I’m just a badly shapened boy
Carry me…. To the other side
Carry me, Carry me…. My eyes are open wide
Carry me Carry me Carry me
Carry me Carry me
Heaven or Hell it’s all the same, you see.
Out here, the gods teach law to kings.
Once your end time has begun
Who you’ve been can’t be undone
Careful what you wish for, son.
And the past sings to the present
In a never ending echo
But the frequency is garbled with regret
And the dead sing to the living
But the living they won’t listen
So the dead drink from the river to forget.
Carry me, Carry me…. To the other side
Carry me, Carry me…. My eyes are open wide
Carry me Carry me Carry me
Carry me Carry me
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2. |
This Time
06:33
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This Time
And you come home
With the smell of war still on your clothes
And the airport’s a freak show
And it’s hard to fake a smile
And you’re wearing your past
In the ribbons pinned on your chest
They can smell the future on your breath
It’s just a shot to calm your nerves.
And your little girl wants to know
When she sits down for suppertime
Is that the last time you’ll have to go
Daddy, did you win the war this time?
And you’re making a list
Of all the dinners that you’ve missed
And all the nights you should have kissed
The kids bad dreams away
And you tally the cost
Of a daughter’s soccer season lost
And the baseballs that won’t get tossed
And a wife who cries alone
And your little girl wants to know
When she sits down for suppertime
Is that the last time you’ll have to go
Daddy, did you win the war this time?
And you wake up
With the dead still hiding in your eyes
From the dreams that can’t be sanitized
You think you’ve come undone
And now and then
Someone asks you how you are, and when
you’re just too worn out to pretend.
You wish you were back there
And your little girl wants to know
When she sits down for suppertime
Is that the last time you’ll have to go?
Daddy did you win the war this time
But then your orders are in
And like that you’re heading back again
It’s a six month pump but you’ll extend
‘Cause that’s where you’re most at home
And your little girl wants to know
When she sits down for suppertime
Is this the last time you’ll have to go
Daddy, will you win the war this time?
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3. |
The Forever War
04:11
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The Forever War
It’s midnight on my front porch,
And I’m staring out at the war
I don’t sleep much anymore
Visions of Shock and Awe,
like a thousand nights before
Bring the war home to my door
I walk my perimeter all night
I won’t sleep until it’s light
I’ll guard the limits of my post
I have these promises to keep
And I’m too scared to go to sleep
In the company of ghosts
A wise man once said, you’ll sleep a long time when you’re dead
So I keep the lights turned way up bright
Sometimes if someone cares, they ask when I was over there
I say I was there just last night.
The cops have been around
One night I got my signals crossed
The judge gave my ex the kids
So I drive around this town
Hoping I might get lost
Thinking ‘bout the costs of what I did.
But give us this day our daily meds
And take a quick look inside my head
You never know what you’ll find in there
I might need a few small repairs
I should be feeling stronger day-by-day
That’s what all the doctors say
My new normal’s there somewhere
But I’m staring out my front door
Fighting the forever war
It’s one long hand of solitaire
A wise man once said, you’ll sleep a long time when you’re dead
So I keep the lights turned way up bright
Sometimes if someone cares, they ask when I was over there
I say I was there just last night.
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4. |
Prehab
04:53
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Prehab
Things are so much simpler since I lost that pesky job.
My time's my own to pass away
A cool dark bar's a better place to blow an afternoon
We'll shoot some pool and drink some beers
Don't let it end so too soon
I'm in Prehab
Joan left me months ago;
she'd say it's for the best.
She kept the kids,
I wrecked the car,
I'll ride the bus I guess,
to Prehab
There's no romance here; just stale, pathetic days that linger on
I wonder if my friends still wonder where the hell I’ve gone?
The shelter’s fine I guess although it’s not what I would choose
They say I’m sick, but me I think it’s just a new excuse
To stay in Prehab
Joan left me months ago;
she'd say it's for the best.
She kept the kids,
I wrecked the car,
I'll ride the bus I guess,
to Prehab
A life like this it's full of bad habits
A life like this it's all hat and no rabbit.
It's hard to live this way; it’s slow and tedious as hell
It’s hard to do this to yourself and feel it’s just as well
But things are so much simpler since I'm living day to day
I hardly feel like dying
I'm in Prehab
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5. |
Trying to Catch Amnesia
05:18
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Trying to Catch Amnesia
When he’s there he thinks of home
He wonders if she cries when she’s alone
He worries about the kids at school
Are their lives stuck in mid-air?
But when he’s home he thinks of there
There, is life or death each day
There is 6000 miles from home
It’s where his mind stays
Memories always on replay,
Home is where he feels alone
And when the walls close in
He’ll pray to Saint Tequila
Or she’ll find him somewhere
Standing in the rain
For no reason,
Just trying to catch amnesia
Things look more or less the same
a piece of trash beside the tree
Well that might be an IED
And the medevac bird is on the way
For those casualties over in aisle three
She’s seen that look a hundred times
the thousand yard stare
He’s looking for some peace of mind
His body’s home, but his mind’s still there.
Some memories must be put away
Like old uniforms are mothballed in a trunk
Not viewed each day
Like portraits on the wall
Of some melancholy hall
And when the walls close in
He’ll pray to Saint Tequila
Or she’ll find him somewhere
Standing in the rain
For no reason
Just trying to catch amnesia
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Ron Capps
Ron Capps is an emerging songwriter whose first EP focuses on the lives of returning combat veterans and their families. Ron served 25 years as a soldier and Foreign Service officer in places like Afghanistan, Iraq, Kosovo, Rwanda and Darfur.
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